teeth...dear teeth...

You and me , both know you breastfed almost until six years.🙈 ( Yes , Jan 2022 beginning we stopped when I got COVID). This fact comes as a secret most of times even to doctors because noone does that here. But I have always believed in the goodness of breastfeeding and extended breastfeeding and have never doubted when we continued it. It was the most beautiful bond between us . The first time I took you home from hospital and when we sat on that chair to feed, I remember that look in your eyes - your eyes were filled with light suspicion...looking at me asking as if can I drink? But from then onwards our togetherness was so much that you started owning my boobs...at age four and all, u used to forcefully turn me and drink at night.( I have always wondered whether a child can be this strong) Whenever you are upset, you have come running to Nestle under my boobs. Nursing you have been the most comfortable thing for both of us ever because it made me feel you are part of me and you were always comforted by it even during sickness and durin upsettin events . 

I had concerns abt your teeth due to night nursing and all. So me and your father used to brush you very strenously until six years. When we decided anyway teeth has to fall now.

I was eagerly waiting for that. That ottappally smile. And your teeth never fell. I have waited for it the longest time eagerly searching online and asking people. As usual you took your time. Your first teeth didn't fell. It had to be taken out by dentist since small ones grew up behind. But the one in the top row fell last week and it was absolute delight. You decided you won't give it to tooth fairy and brushed( foto dwn)and kept it inside treasure box. It didn't pain you at all. 

This week you were sick. You had fever for many days. Moments like this, I realise my heart beating for you. I would do anythin for you to be okay, I realise that and am scared of it. My love for you might hamper you , which I cannot afford also. When the doctor suspected dengue, my mind couldn't even rest. But once when your blood tests came out positive and your fever was falling, you and me had the best time together. Hugging and sleeping, reading stories and not at all studying...I just miss you so much when am going to work today...adding the ottappally fotos here...with lots of love...